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Purposefully sleeping on the "wrong" side of the bed tonight... Tomorrow will be so confusing. #fb 12:35 am Feb 09

@thecrookedbush *like* 12:32 am Feb 09

I hate when I drink sleepy tea, then don't ever feel sleepy in time for sleeping and get to work hungover, yet booze free... 12:30 am Feb 09

I love the way you lie #fb 3:16 am Feb 07

I'm still in love with judas 2:39 am Feb 07

So tonight was a giant bucket of #fail #fb 2:00 am Feb 07

I'm sorry if it sounds selfish, but it's me me me! #fb 1:42 am Feb 07

I would like to see Madonna before I die... Maybe if I had a boyfriend or an ex to arrange that final gift... 1:41 am Feb 07

Watching telly on my own then... #fb 12:27 am Feb 07

@Jason_Sensation I'll talk to you topped or topless.. 11:57 pm Feb 05

April 03, 2008
Hawtness Emergency!
gay like thatwhat's up?

I had to wake up extra early to pick-up my dry cleaning. It looked like they weren’t open yet and I was getting pissed as I strode up to the door. I mean it was after 10…

 

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tagged: work cleaning pissed sign dry cleaner lights
February 26, 2008
Daniel And The Gassy Dry Cleaner
whaat!

All I wanted was my dry cleaning. I was dropping off, as well as picking up. I go to the same place all the time. It’s handy. Right next to my grocery store. I think I need a new place… Anyway, so I walk in and one of the usual young gals greets me. Not the pretty one, but the other one. So she steps over to the counter and starts to like process my transaction. How many, laundry or dry clean, etc. All pretty normal. But then she suddenly looked a bit pained and hammered at her chest. “Excuse me! I am not used to drinking Sprite.” Okay, ew. Gross. But I tried to be nice and chuckled. Wrong move on my part. She began to talk about how she once burped totally loud in front of a customer and had to ‘pretend’ to be embarrassed and like lady-like, but she really wasn’t cause it ‘felt so good’.

Oh. My. Gaaawd.

So there I am, trapped as she goes on about her gas issues. “Sometimes when I am sitting at home I just totally let it out. I don’t care which end it comes out, it all feels so good.” Wait, lemme repeat that in bold, for effect: “I don’t care which end it comes out, it all feels so good”. At this point I was convinced the place smelled funny. It was so hard to be polite and ignore the whole thing. Cause that is what I usually do when someone, even close friends say inappropriate things. I ignore it and change the subject. No, this time I wanted only to leave. But I was a bit trapped. Thank god they always keep the door propped open. Heh, now I know why!

How to I find these people?


tagged: laundry ew grocery gas fart dry cleaner gross gal burp
August 29, 2007
Prompt Attention
funny hahalink-tastic!

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imageApparently a real dry cleaner too. Amazing! (via Richard)


tagged: links funny pants dry cleaner drop
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Hi. I'm Daniel. This is my blog. I don't update like I used to, but my awesomeness requires an actual website.

0 days and 0 hours until my birthday!


really random quote

“She is there, behind the rich and powerful... beside the rich and powerful... *under* the rich and powerful.” - Absolutely Fabulous


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