My family made a decision when we were growing up to move west. You see, my father had to go where there was work (he was an electrician) and the extended family back in the home town were too much drama. Now I don’t know how true that was, but that’s what my parents told us. When my brother and I were still quite young we’d travel back to Massachusetts once a year or so and visit. Both sets of grandparents, my mother’s sister, my father’s sisters and brother, and all the cousins. We did that for years while in between the odd set of grandparents would visit us. As we got older and things got more expensive we traveled much less. The grandparents still visited, and my mother’s sister and her daughter, and we’d see my father’s brother’s family as they were not as far. All those other relatives just became people that only sent a holiday card. Never once did they visit, so we never went back. My parents would go out to handle emergencies, and eventually my mother’s mom and sister moved to Florida. My father’s parents have since passed, and my brother went with my father to some of the arrangements. I was already out on my own trying to make my way…

I guess the point is that there are all these relatives that are strangers to me. A lot too. My father had 3 sisters and 2 brothers (I think, to be honest I forget the total since some have died). At least 3 of those had families that I haven’t seen since I was like 14. It’s weird to think about somehow. All these people that I knew existed but were really not part of our lives. It felt normal though. Huh. So anyways, when my brother chose to move to Boston he did so knowing that he’d be near that portion of the family, actively choosing to reconnect. He is at some family member’s home for dinner every weekend. He is invited to every event, BBQ, potluck, and all that stuff. He even juggles the drama of which part of the family isn’t speaking to whom! LOL, right?

So sometime in December I got this email with the subject of “hello”. It was from my father’s sister (the one that we always knew was a lesbian, even tho she never said. She has *always* lived with the same woman):

Is this nephew Danny in California?

I deleted it. It scared me! What could she want and HOW did she find me? Thank gawd she had used my *personal email* account, or I would have died. I soon forgot about it, until a week or so ago when I got another one, from the same aunt forwarding the last note, but with this added:

I’m trying this again.

OMFG! Now it was like she had verified the address and resent and was calling me out. I HAD to reply. Ugh. So I thought about it and settled with this:

Hello! Sorry I didn’t reply to the last note… I must have missed it. December is crazy for me! Anyway, yup, that’s the right email!

Lame, I know. But I have met this woman like maybe 6 times when I was a kid, so what more could she expect? Anyhoo, here’s the reply:

Well Danny,
I have tried many searches to find you, and finally your email showed up on a forward from your father.
I’m glad to be in touch with you.

I have heard that you and Richard have been a couple for a long time now.  Congratulations to both of you.  Did you get married?
[insert “roomate’s” name] and I got married when it first became legal here.  We are both retired now and loving it.

We were really mad about the prop 8 vote.
It is interesting to me that Prop 8 vote has done so much to promote marriage rights, even though the vote was against it.

I have heard that you are busy in retail work and living in San Diego.  Is that right?
You were in high school the last time we saw you—just a kid.
Bee well,
[insert aunt’s name]

About the “Bee well”, well after raising goats for many years they are now raising bees. So now what? Do I reply? Is this my new “pen pal”? I really think it’s sweet that she contacted me, if a bit creepy. I mean, where was she all these years? If she had known, like I think she did, that I would turn out gay I would think she’d have tried to have “been there” for me years ago. She didn’t. And what were the “many searches”? she tried? I was for two weeks a few years back the number one result on Google for “Daniel” so she can’t have tried hard. Oh, she also could have asked her brother, my father. But that would have required speaking to him. I may have lost track with the drama, but I do know that my father isn’t popular with all the separate camps that make up his remaining family.

Wow, This has become an essay! Let me know what you think. Reply or not, and if so… HOW??

tagged: gay email lesbian family aunt contact

daniel · mid-afternoon · 6 comments · ping it

Apparently a lot of email comes in at this time. Like daily mailings and newsletters and such.

Fascinating.

tagged: email spam newsletters three in the morning

daniel · terribly early · say it · ping it

“for that extra offensive touch…”

tagged: you tube funny email kitten tenders

daniel · late at night · 2 comments · ping it

So I got this in my email. Seems like something to pass on. Plus I got nothin’ else today kids. Nada. So, enjoy the following P.S.A. from dp.com…

JURY DUTY SCAM:

This has been verified by the FBI and Snopes (their links are included below).

Please pass this on to everyone in your email address book. It is spreading fast so be prepared should you get this call.  Most of us take that summons for jury duty seriously a new and ominous kind of fraud has surfaced.

The caller claims to be a jury coordinator. If you protest that you never received a summons for jury duty, the scammer asks you for your Social Security number and date of birth so he or she can verify the information and cancel the arrest warrant. Give out any of this information and bingo; your identity was just stolen.

The fraud has been reported so far in 11 states, including New York, Oklahoma, Florida, Illinois, Texas and Colorado. This (swindle) is particularly insidious because they use intimidation over the phone to try to bully people into giving information by pretending they are with the court system. The FBI and the Federal Court System have issued nationwide alerts on their web sites, warning consumers about the fraud.

Snopes site: says this is real fraud.
http://www.snopes.com/crime/fraud/juryduty.asp

FBI site: warns about the fraud.
http://www.fbi.gov/page2/june06/jury_scams060206.htm

So there you go. Love you. Kisses. Mean it.

tagged: email fraud warning security jury p.s.a.

daniel · the wee hours · say it · ping it

Our good friend Mike scoped this one out for us. There will be NO tagging. Don’t even worry. It does provide good blog fodder tho. FYI. Here we go:

Wrapping paper or gift bags?
Wrapping paper. Unless of course the gift is a bottle of wine, or of an odd size that can’t be boxed and wrapped properly.

Real tree or Artificial?
Come on.. You want all my secrets? Artificial and pre-lit. If I do a real tree the lighting process of wrapping each branch (OCD) with lights becomes such an ordeal. Not to mention removing them. Once I tossed the tree out lights and all. Artificial is just better for the sanity of all involved.

When do you put up the tree?
First week of December. The cards go out that week too. With my job if I wait it won’t get done.

When do you take the tree down?
Normally, December 26th. Although my mom and I had been known to do it Christmas day back when I lived at home… This year we have the post holiday gig, so it’ll be up an extra week. *cringe*

Do you like eggnog?
Only when thinned with booze.

Favorite gift received as a child?
My most favorite gift as a child was actually at Easter. I wanted baby chickens, and my parents found these fake ones that were so cute… As an adult it was my iPod. Heh. Both times.

Do you have a nativity scene?
Erm. No.

Hardest person to buy for?
We don’t really ‘do’ gifts. Richard and I do purchases for *us* yearly, like this year we bought the bedroom set. That was like all the gifts all year. We don’t buy a gift for anything. And with my folks, well, yeah. No gifts.

Easiest person to buy for?
See above.

Mail or email Christmas cards?
Mail. Hello! The dp.com card exchange is renowned on the internets.

Worst Christmas gift you ever received?
A slip of paper stating ‘this certificate good for _____ signed Santa.’ WTF?

Favorite Christmas Movie?
A Christmas Story. It just rocks. That leg lamp? OMG.

Least Favorite?
The Sound Of Music. Is that even Christmas? That thing gives me gas.

When do you start shopping for Christmas?
There’s no shopping.

Have you ever recycled a Christmas present?
You have to sometimes with the ‘hostess gifts’.

Favorite thing to eat at Christmas?
Booze.

Clear lights or colored on the tree?
Clear. Is this really a question?

Favorite Christmas song?
I find them all mind numbing. I work retail. I think *because* of that the new ones, the alternative artists are better for me.

Travel at Christmas or stay home?
Neither. Retail. Is ‘stay at work’ an option here?

Can you name all of Santa’s reindeer?
Fuck no. Is it January yet? Where’s my drink?

Angel on the tree top or a star?
Neither. See Flickr.

Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning?
My mom and I were on the side of Eve, back in the day. Now there are no gifts. Who cares?

Most annoying thing about this time of year?
The public and their selfish and self important attitudes.

Favorite ornament theme or color?
Red.

Favorite for Christmas dinner?
Is there a dinner? We were always brunch people.

Least Favorite?
Huh? Dinner? See above yo.

What do you want for Christmas this year?
Lottery winnings. Sadly tho, you have to play to win.

tagged: richard work holiday christmas ocd internets booze email meme santa

daniel · the wee hours · 1 comment · ping it

Well… So far so good. No one seems to have noticed the email addy snafu. Monday will be the true test. That’s when dad has idle time at the computer. *shudder*. We’ll see.

*lays low*

tagged: update email dad computer

daniel · early evening · say it · ping it

So now that my blog might be outed (thanks hon!) and my mother could very well become a daily reader I figured today was a good a day as any to introduce my new knitting forum. It’s called Yernin’ Fer Yarn.

Okay I kid. My mother does not knit. But she could be joining us here at dp.com very soon. I am officially as blog-outed as I can be without direct links going out in email. What if it happens? What if mom does become a regular reader? Hell. I think I am filtering now… wait till that day comes. Would I block her? Could I? Do I have to? I am not really offensive. I am out of the closet. No surprises there. Sure there are a few things I’d rather not have her (or my father) know about my life, but done is done. What could it hurt? So I have sex. So I lied as a kid. So I partied a bit heavily in my youth. So I almost dated a drug dealer. So I said that my parents splash water when they wash their hands. I really have nothing that I am ashamed of here. I just don’t want yet an other ‘known’ audience member to write for. I cannot picture myself publishing some of the things that I do knowing my MOTHER might read it. Part of me would want to delete my whole online existence. Part of me says SCREW THAT! I have put a lot into this for the last 4 (FOUR!!!) years. What the hell? I could block their IP addresses if they come. But that seems extreme. It’s my family.

I hate that I have to even consider this. OMG. The problems caused by one stupidly created email.

tagged: blog online mom omg email sex parents stressed youth filtering   stressed

daniel · the wee hours · 4 comments · ping it

Enough said, right? It’s one of those work related things, as well as family stuff, so off to Member’s Only Land…

tagged: richard work blog day mom email bitchy loud family mess

daniel · evening · 2 comments · ping it

Sticky entry posted 11/28/07 @ 8:11 PM

Hey everybody! It’s that magic time of year again. The time when I solicit your personal info. No seriously! Each year around the holiday dp.com gives back. We give back to you, the reader. It is the annual dp.com holiday Card Exchange™! All you have to do is send me your snail mail address, and you will receive a sassy holiday card from yours truly here in sunny San Diego! No strings attached! I promise not to show up at your door and kill you too, because that would be rude…

Last year we sent out upwards from 20 cards! And I got that many as well. Great fun yo. And, if you were on the list last year, you are automatically signed up this year! Yay!

So if you are interested, here’s that contact form. Name, address, state, zip. You know the drill. *grin*

UPDATE: Cards are purchased. Time is running out to get on the official dp.com holiday list! A quick note on that…  If we haven’t met thru email or comments, yet you trusted me with your home address, let’s chat some time! 

tagged: holiday update time email list cards mail chat sassy

daniel · evening · 5 comments · ping it