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what's up?
Okay. No it didn’t. Well it kinda did.
You see, our good friend Fred was going to skip pride and drive down to LA for an event. After much debate and confusion Richard and I ended up tagging along. The itinerary was this: Leave San Diego by noon, drive to LA, check into hotel, go eat, go back to hotel to get pretty, go to Outfest movie premier, and hit after party at a club. After that there was no set plan other than an eventual return to SD on Saturday no later than 5:00 PM.
Well kids, it was exactly as planned. The drive to LA is about 2.5 hours. Thankfully Richard and I had our iPhones. More thankfully than that, Fred’s car has multiple power outlets. Heh. So the drive up passed pretty quick. We checked into a surprisingly nicer than expected Days Inn. It wasn’t great, but not horrible either. It was right next to an In-N-Out Burger, which became the immediate solution to our second task upon getting to town. I refused. I was trying to be as flexible and non-bitchy as possible. I know I don’t travel well, so I tried to be nice about it. It was a fine choice for them, but I’d still need to eat soon too, and I won’t eat burger. Luckily, after I carefully got that out on the table, Fred’s innate Cruise Director Instincts took over. He suggested a trip to The Grove. 
Brilliant. Many food choices for everyone. We hit the road. Of course as soon as he pointed it out, we had decided on The Whisper Lounge. It is pure glamour. An open-air establishment with drapery and pretty people and.. I can’t describe it really. It’s just fabulous. So we went in and proceeded to order up snacks and cocktails. I don’t remember when he noticed, but Fred made us aware that Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott were behind us with their family (we assume). OMGOMGOMG!!! As soon as he said it I could HEAR HER. I mean, she has a distinctive voice. OMG. We tried not to make a scene. I *really* wanted to get a photo, or talk to her… Something. Fred wisely reminded me that I need to “act normal” and treat her like anyone else. “We don’t want to ruin her time, right?” He’s good like that since he knows people. I took his advice and refrained. Richard staged a bathroom trip so he could ogle them. I sat and listened in. We stayed a long time… Tori and crew had several bottles of champagne. Well, at least 2. LOL. Finally our time was up and we had to go get pretty. Richard insists that Tori smiled at him as we left… OMG!
So getting ready for the Premier was pretty stressful since I had forgotten a belt. My outfit NEEDED a belt. I tried to con my man out of his, but he was having none of it. So we went out on the town with me already feeling kinda insecure. I mean really. LA? Without a belt? As soon as we arrived at the Ford Amphitheater I forgot all about it. Not only is the venue gorgeous, but there were soooo many pretty people. Pretty boys… I mean it *was* Outfest, right? So anyway, the theater is backed up to a hill, and the natural landscape is the main feature of the place. It’s really awesome, actually. We headed up to the top, where they was a concession stand, as well as the entrance for the celebs… Red carpet people! Wich in this case was a red mat taped to the sidewalk with an “Outfest” logo’d backdrop. Hrm. Fanceh. But whatever. We hung out, sipping our drinks. Fred found a photographer friend of his that chatted with us a bit and snapped our picture. Woo!
So the movie was Mulligans. It was actually really good. I liked it, tho the story was painful. But a movie that makes you feel anything has done it’s job. Plus the actors were a pretty bunch. Heh.
After the movie we headed over to Eleven for the VIP after party. Fred was on The List. Richard and I hadn’t been to a nightclub like that in years. It was a big time. Especially the part were we got to go upstairs to the VIP area and hang out with the cast of the film. Again, Fred was on The List. It was awesome… I got to meet Reichen Lehmkuhl who was also at the after party. Let me just pause a moment to let that sink in…
OMG!OMG!OMG! REICHEN!!! OMG!OMG!OMG!
Okay. So after we got tired of the madness of the club we headed to some sidewalk bar/restaurant for a bit. That was a great time as we got to watch the crazies of WeHo pass by as we ate and enjoyed a few more cocktails. We made it back to the hotel by like 2:30ish. LOL
The next day (Saturday) we didn’t want to rush right out. Obviously a bit of sleeping in and hydrating were in order, plus the traffic going down to San Diego (Pride morning) could be icky… So we left the hotel at checkout time and had an amazing brunch-ish meal at Hugo’s followed by a trip to the old Xanadu site and another trip to The Grove, for shopping. A perfect morning. My friend Fred really is an excellent Cruise Director. Plus he knows his way around. AND he drove. Really, really awesome. As we cruised slowly to the freeway Fred spotted a familiar face. As he pointed out Ms. Doris Roberts, she bent over right on the side of the road to pick up… A COUPON! LOL! Classic! Once on the freeway, on the way home, we sang songs from the Xanadu soundtrack with the windows down in traffic. Just in case people weren’t already aware that the car was full of ‘mos. LOL
Fred pulled up to our house to drop us off at like 4:57 PM. Three minutes to spare. Talk about sticking to the itinerary!
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pop culture
I love Paris in the springtime.
I love Paris in the fall.
I love Paris in the winter when it drizzles,
I love Paris in the summer when it sizzles.
Wait. What? She’s going to jail?! Oh. Heh.
I love Paris in the slammer.
I love Paris behind bars.
I love Paris in the shower when she lathers..
Cause I made her my bitch yo.
LOS ANGELES, California (AP)—A judge sentenced Paris Hilton to 45 days in county jail Friday for violating her probation, putting the brakes on the hotel heiress’s famous high life.
Hilton, who parlayed her name and relentless partying into worldwide notoriety, must go to jail by June 5.
Full Story.
via Pink Is The New Blog.
UPDATE: I just thought of an alternate ending to the ditty… ‘I love Paris on the tile when she falls.’
Okay, I’m done..
